


Hollow Holo-Love

by cruisedirector, CyberMum



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: F/M, Plot What Plot, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-02-02
Updated: 2002-02-02
Packaged: 2017-10-06 23:30:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/58909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cruisedirector/pseuds/cruisedirector, https://archiveofourown.org/users/CyberMum/pseuds/CyberMum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Anyone else sick of holographic love stories?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hollow Holo-Love

**Author's Note:**

> Having read reports of the then-upcoming Janeway/holo-lover episode, we thought we might offer a few choice words on the subject...

It seems when one travels through space  
One has to avoid the embrace  
Of one's sexy first mate  
Who would like to relate  
If he could only get to first base.

One tries to find a substitute  
To assuage an urge so acute  
That one contemplates sex  
On the ships holo-decks  
In lieu of that guy in the suit.

When searching for programs so quaint  
One should be aware of the taint  
Of the humiliation  
Which could follow elation  
Should the crew learn one's not a saint.

When mired in holo-addiction  
One might try some older fiction  
Where characters historic  
Speak in terms metaphoric -  
Suggestive speech couched in diction.

One could access the novel "Jane Eyre"  
Moaning "Rochester..." into thin air  
Or try "Wuthering Heights"  
With its angsty delights  
And enjoy all those depths of despair.

Imagine how sweet it might sound  
"Oh my heart, sir is all in a pound  
And my eyelids do flutter  
At the love words you utter"  
As you sink with a sigh to the ground.

But then no matter how horny  
One might be, this could be corny.  
And one might risk one's cover  
To find a holo-lover  
To seduce in words more porn-y.

One can have in one's little black book  
A pirate, a rogue, and a crook  
Who know nothing at all  
Of a ship's protocol  
And know how to have fun in a nook.

A lover who knows how to use  
Those sexual aids that amuse  
Captains who abstain  
And wish to remain  
Celibate models for their crews.

Another unlooked for reward  
Of holo-love can't be ignored  
One can vary the menu  
As well as the venue  
And therefore avoid being bored.

So if one must seek one's release  
In order to find inner peace  
And one can't philander  
With one's own commander  
For fear of the Star Fleet police -

One might as well use the resource  
Available to one. Of course  
There's far less satisfaction  
In holo-deck action  
It's merely a laser light source.


End file.
